I Aspire To Inspire Through My Pen!

We Attract Who We Are

Do you ever wonder why you continuously go through a series of repeated situations in relationships & friendships? I know I do, and this can sometimes bring resentment towards those relationship/failed relationships (if they ended) and it can even lead to one being too careful or too ”picky” when it comes to choosing new friends or partners in future, and at times this also creates blame games and pointing fingers at others for those failed relationships but here’s one thing I have realized in all of those dilemmas; that in life we attract Who We Are.

Whether it is through friendships, relationships or even strangers, the truth we ignore or we are unaware of is that we attract who we are in life. This may be controversial to others because of a popular saying which states ”opposites attract”, however I have learned that as much as they say opposite attract, when it comes to people in our lives, they are close to us because of one common thing that has attracted us to them, whether we know it or not.


As a fellow young lady, I often hear other women describe the kind of men they would one day love to marry, like ” I want a successful man” but they themselves don’t want to work hard in life. I hear men say, ”I just want a loyal partner as a wife”, but they themselves struggle to be loyal too, and sometimes both men and women find them selves complaining about always attracting the same kind of people in their lives, saying ”I always attract men who just wanna sit in the house and watch tv all day”, the truth is your partner may be relaxed because they also think the same thing about a particular situation in your life, it may not be career related issue but a situation at home, like my partner never wants to clean in the house.

While this is an issue that affects people in relationships, it affects friendships as well; one may wonder why they always attract friends that are not loyal or friends who just always ask ask ask, and they conveniently forget to give give give. This I believe is not a co-incidence that you are repeatedly affected by the same situation always, but this can be a sign that there is a particular area in your life that is not good, and it needs to be changed in order to see different results in relationships.


Sometimes one may argue that the reason why they always go through repeated situations where they attract the same kind of people in their lives is because of people taking advantage of their character  and that it has nothing to do with attracting who they are, like ”I have a good heart, and people keep taking advantage of my kindness”.

AAEAAQAAAAAAAAYzAAAAJDdmOGMyZmI0LTZiMjQtNDRlYy05OTQyLWMwZjE5YmNiMGM3YQ.jpgBut the truth is we all attract who we are, and until we make a change in or lives, we will continue to see the same results in relationships.

The sad thing about attracting the same kind of people in our lives whether it is in our relationships or friendship is that sometimes we attract who we are based on our backgrounds; such as a situation where a child who grew up with a Mother who constantly dated men who abused her may affect that child’s live in future relationships. The child may go through a similar situation, where they attract same abusive men in future. However the good thing is that anything is possible and it is up to that child to deal with the past so that  she can change repeated patterns by working on themselves and finding value in loving themselves which may lead in to finding the right partner in life.

We attract who we are, and whatever relationship/friendships we desire, the power is in us, and it is found in working on ourselves. We shouldn’t want loyal friends if we are not prepared to be loyal ourselves, and we shouldn’t want a loving husband if we do not have love. It all starts with ourselves.



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